Each time we have added another family member things have gotten wild for a while. Just like my infants who deprived us of sleep and took several months to settle into a routine and schedule, my new big kids have all needed a few months to find their place and settle in. And regardless of how the new addition has come to our family, Brad and I have always taken a few months to figure out the new logistics and adjust to the new needs of our group.
We have had a couple 'aha' moments in the past few weeks that have made us change the way we've been doing things. I am now wondering how we have not been doing these things all along.
The biggest change has been in our morning routine. For the past year, since we moved to our new home, I have been driving the kids 20 minutes down the freeway to attend school. Yes, we have schools right here in our new town. But we love our school and the one-drop-stop made the drive worth it. If the kids were attending schools near our home I would have 5 schools to drop off and pick up with 4 different start and end times. Driving 20 minutes to school for one stop makes more sense than spending 2 or more hours each day dropping off and picking up from 4 different schools.
But with new needs and new children the 45 minute drive every morning was just not ideal. It dawned on me that Brad drives by the school every morning on the way to work just one hour before we were making the drive. So, after pleading my case, Brad agreed to try working from home the first hour of his day and then taking the kids to school on his way to work. And it is working!!
Not spending those 45 minutes in the car in the morning has made so many things better!
-Being home in the morning has allowed Caity and I both an extra 15 minutes sleep. How can such a short amount of time feel so much better? Simply having the flexibility to eat my breakfast after the kids leave gives me an extra 10-15 minutes to get them out the door.
-I am able to prepare breakfast and lunches for ALL 10 family members. Brad and Caity used to be on their own in this department because they both left the house too early. I've been looking for a way to get healthy food to work with Brad for a while now. There just wasn't enough time before he left for the office. Now it's a piece of cake.
-I have the time to work with Aiden on reading and music before school. This is a HUGE help to speech development that I just did not have time for before. It only takes about 15 minutes. And I couldn't find 15 minutes anywhere else in our day.
-I have time to stay on top of the morning dishes. Again, such a little shift. But it has a domino effect on our day. We were truly struggling to keep up with the dishes.
-Because I have the time to tidy up a bit and get my bearings before having to rush out the door my stress level is so much better. Now that Dad is making the school run I have a handle on our home environment before leaving the house instead of sprinting from place to place constantly behind stressing out about the things I am not doing at home.
The best part about this change is it has had very little effect on Brad. He is still driving the same route. He is still getting the same amount of work done. And he gets the bonus of good food and a morning connection with all of us he was missing before.
Seriously? How were we not doing this sooner?
A coupe months ago Brad was able to negotiate some changes to his pay structure. And together we finally created a family budget that made sense and met ALL our family needs. Again, same resources, just reorganized. All of the sudden our family budget is healthy! Just a little change and all of the sudden a huge stressor is dismissed. We are now excited for weekly budget meetings rather than dreading them. We are optimistic for our financial future for the first time in about 6 years.
How were we not doing this sooner?
The last major change has been Jacob's school arrangements. This one was less about a small change we could make and more about God finally putting the pieces in the place that Jacob needed and us being patient enough to wait for them. Last year Jacob was a Transitional Kindergarten dropout. He attended TK from August to November before I pulled him out and chose to home school instead. I would not change what I did. It was absolutely the right thing for him. But I have been waiting and watching and just last week I stumbled upon a Kindergarten class that seems like the right fit for him. He's been attending for a week now and is LOVING it. And that last little change of all the baby birds being away from the nest at school part of the day has made mama's life feel normal again.
Suddenly the laundry is caught up. The cupboards are full of food again. The house is closer to the 'tidy standard' this mama likes to keep. Things like Family Home Evening and date nights are back on the calendar. Homework is getting done. The cars are getting emptied and cleaned. The trash can is getting put on the curb on the right day. Things are just starting to settle.
Now to get my head up and look ahead again. Planning and prep time has been reclaimed!
Deep exhale...
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