Life as usual

The first few days were crazy overwhelming. I remember things feeling hectic when Justin came home and we suddenly had 6 children. But this time around I was starting to worry we had jumped in over our heads. Eight children. E-I-G-H-T.

My worries were premature.

The dust has already begun to settle and this feels really good. Nathan desperately needed the structure and routine of school (and space away from us) to process and settle. The kids all needed to return to school after spring break to find their routines and just settle. Mom needed the structure of a 'normal' work week to find the groove and just settle. We are all finding our stride and this whole "family of 10" thing is already starting to feel normal.

So, fun memories from the past few days:

Nathan accompanied Justin to his first youth activity with the kids from church. Ice blocking was not exactly a hit activity in his opinion. He only tried it once. But he was a decent sport about it.

In case you are unfamiliar with this particular activity it is sledding down a grassy hill on a block of ice.

Justin got the hang of it quickly...

...Nathan, not so much.

The boys are realizing everyone pitches in around here. The boys who could barely stay focused on puling a single weed their first Saturday home are suddenly our best workers. Being 'allowed' to touch and participate in clean up is currently a novelty. They are both eager to 'get' to participate. I wonder how long their enthusiasm will last...

Nathan needed a hair cut. I was not expecting him to squeal like a little girl every time I touched his head. I have a video, but it is too big to share here. We will always remember the way he flinched and squealed with every clip of the scissors and touch of the clippers. He looks pretty dang handsome with the new look if I do say so myself. Maybe our next trim will involve less dramatics. Then again, drama seems to be the norm with this one...

Nathan's first day of school! This was so very needed...

My favorite part of the 'honeymoon' is the way the kids play together. They are all shoulder to shoulder all day long. They bicker and get tired of each other like siblings should. But the first weeks are always so nice because they will all play the board games or go to the parks that are too boring when brand new siblings are not involved.

Uno. If I never play another hand of Uno it will be too soon...

For Aiden's very first Friday-night-date we gave the bicycle a try. Aiden has obviously never touched a bicycle before. He could not even stand over it without support. Balance issues can be common with deafness. But this was simply a matter of exposure. Once I showed him how to coast without peddling and we practiced together for about 20 minutes he started to settle in. Now he can balance consistently and we just need to learn to pedal and break. It will take him a bit longer than the others, but he'll be riding soon.

This kid has weaseled his way into everyone's heart very quickly.

Still my 'honey-bear.' Seriously, ooey gooey sweet.

Coming up on three weeks home I have to keep reminding myself how new these boys are. We are still adjusting. And there is so much to learn for so many of us. But it really does feel like life as usual around here.

China updates

Just a friendly note to family and friends who are interested in going back through the China posts. I have finally had the chance to update several posts with pictures, videos and a few additional stories. If you have some time to burn and want to see the extended version, go back to the post March 28 (or just click here) to catch up on the posts that have been edited.

Hope you enjoy as much as I did!

A Great First Week

Tomorrow marks one week home. It has been a great first week. We have played. We have shopped. We have had melt downs. We have registered for school. We have hiked. We have watched movies. It has been a full week.

Tomorrow Nathan starts school. I suspect this will be a welcome comfort for him. Thirteen years in an institution has made him very reliant on regimented routine. Being 'on vacation' for the first time in his life is beginning to wear on him. I am looking forward to seeing how school effects his emotions. There have been many for him this week.

I think of all of the boys who have joined our family through international adoption, Nathan has had the greatest culture shock. He just didn't know. Justin had been to America to visit through a hosting program before joining our family. Ty and Jacob enjoyed the cocoon and eased their way into American society. Aiden seems to enjoy a certain reprieve from the culture shock in his lack of verbal dependence. He isn't bothered by the fact that he can't carry on a conversation with anyone. His dozen signs and handful of words and names is serving him just fine. Nathan on the other hand has been completely shocked to discover no one here speaks Mandarin. No one enjoys his snacks he brought to share. We eat differently. We dress differently. Nothing in our tiny town looks like a city in China.

During his first 3 days in America Nathan demanded that everyone: flight attendants, airport personnel, waitresses, and siblings, speak Mandarin to him. It began with the siblings as a playful 'joke' but progressed to frustration and desperation by day 4. Monday the volcano finally blew. I overheard him yelling in Mandarin to Ty and quickly came into the room to intervene as I heard in Mandarin: "You are Chinese! Why won't you speak Chinese to me!"

I share this experience here to help others who may be considering an older child adoption and even toddler/young adolescent adoption. Even when they are excited to come to America they have no idea what it means. They just don't think about what the change will be like. They do not have the life experiences to draw from. It is similar to trying to explain to a woman who has never given birth before what a contraction and delivery feels like. No matter how much you practice that Lamaze, you just don't know until you have done it before.

I want to return to my statement that this has been a great first week. Nathan is doing very well and we are having a lot of fun together with both our new boys. There have been tears for some family members. There have been big needs. There have been sit-down discussions with a few. But overall we have been able to have a lot of fun. I can honestly say everything is going smoother than I expected. We have all grown so much over the past 5 years. These kids are all amazing. And God is good.

Easter egg hunt at Nana and Papa's. I let the kids out in waves to be sure there wasn't a frenzy. Drew, Jacob and Aiden went first. We had not explained anything. Aiden ran through the door with enthusiasm on the heels of his brothers, watched them for about 15 seconds and then began exclaiming, "jidan!" over and over again (egg in Mandarin) as he ran about collecting eggs. Nathan collected a few eggs with his usual grin and quiet demeanor. Everyone loves the Easter egg hunt.

Still loving my hearts.

If you don't look closely you might miss the playdoh heart he is holding. Aiden continues to be eager to participate in this tradition. 

Aiden has also been eager to participate in Jacob's home school lessons. Jacob both loves and hates having a 'classmate.' It is exciting to have a new brother and show off what he knows. But it was also a bit more fun when he had me all to himself...

Flat family has come in handy for working on family names with Aiden. One of his habits that wears quickly on everyone's nerves is the need to get your attention by grunting or yelling "Ah!" until you look. Much like my need to teach him quickly to use 'mama' the kids are desperate to hear their names and bring the volume level down.

I taught Aiden to write his name on the top of his papers for our school work. Now he is excited to recognize his name anywhere he can find it. Caity taught him to write mom and dad (even though he calls us mama and baba) and he happily drew this little picture the other night. Squeezy heart.

Nathan also likes to show us his writing ability. He can actually write better than he can speak. When he tries to use an English word and is not understood he will often spell the word to clarify. Somehow the other day Caitlin was telling him how to spell her name and he disagreed. He insisted that her name was kitty. (This is another little insight into the current emotional status as we all recognize that Caitlin knows how to spell her name). But once the heated discussion ended and he accepted her name spelling, he wrote "I have a good Caity friend" and all was forgiven.

Aiden was able to join Jacob's gymnastics class as a free trial for the day. He had never done anything like this before. His smile was a mile wide. He was the oldest and biggest boy in the class but that did not bother him one bit. He had never done a forward roll or cartwheel before. All of the skills they did were new and thrilling to him. This was so fun to watch.

As luck would have it this was an 'evaluation' week so all of the kids got ribbons for the skills they could pass off. Aiden received three ribbons. I am pretty sure this was a first experience as well. He was so proud of his little ribbons.

As a special treat we had some friends from out of town stop by for a visit on their way up the mountain. Everyone was excited to play and it was a welcome reprieve to have some new faces and friends to introduce. There were 14 kids in my house for a few hours. I barely noticed. My friend told me, "You were just built for 14 kids." I quickly interjected, "Eight! I was built for eight!" And she replied with, "I think you said that same thing to me about six..." I did. I remember saying it. Sigh.

I am hoping to find the time to add pictures and videos to my China posts over the next few days. I will alert y'all. But keep an eye out. I have so many fun pictures to add!

Onward and upward!

Day 2 home

Today was our first full day together. It was a great day. There is so much to process. It is a whole new ball of wax adding two family members at once. Brad and I are both having moments of deep breathing as we remind ourselves this is the very beginning. So much will change (and settle) in the coming months.

The boys have done surprisingly well with jet lag. We all slept soundly through the night and kept decent attitudes during the day. Neither of the boys felt ill (like Ty did his first day) or crashed out asleep during the day. And I managed to pull a full day without even a nap! I hope I don't eat my words tonight and the sound sleep continues...

We started the day with dad directing some outdoor chores while mom caught up on laundry. Our new boys have a lot to learn about work. Neither of them could stick to a task for more than 10 seconds. But they responded well to direction and by the end of the project Aiden found his motivation and was the last to put his tools away.

After lunch we wanted to get out for a little adventure. So we went for a hike. Everyone had a blast. But jet-lagged mama forgot to bring the bag with waters and snacks so there was come complaining by the end of our walk.

Nathan is very sweet with 'little brothers.' He is still very quiet and hesitant to get into the middle of the action with the bigger kids. But Jacob and Drew were his buddies today.

Ty and Justin seem so much bigger to me. They have both been amazing this time.

Aiden was Amber's little buddy today.

Justin was unusually nice and attached to Ty today. I wonder if it will stick...

Seriously, all our kids...

After our hike we enjoyed a little down time with some TV and snacks. Then it was off to accomplish our one errand for the day. Today was an office for medical insurance for the boys. We always end up having to go in person with their translated documents. Trying to get this one tied up quickly so Nathan can get enrolled in school before the end of the year.

A friend brought us dinner (bless the woman!) and after dinner we enjoyed some games together. Nathan and Aiden are both warming up to the dog. Aiden was scared at first. Nathan was more calm but obviously uncomfortable. By the end of the day they were both loving on her.

We are finding a new groove with bedtime routines. I am so glad the kids are on spring break to give us a couple days to figure this out before the school morning routine starts again.

Now it's off to bed with us!

First Day Home

Jet lag is in full effect. So this will be short before I pass out. Thirty minutes of sleep over the past 26 hours has not been quite enough.

Travel was as smooth as imaginably possible. The boys were great with the exception of Aiden asking every 30 minutes or so if we would land soon. He could not understand why it was taking so long to land. Our flight was on time. We had very little turbulence and decent food. The airline staff was incredibly patient with my son who is realizing the rest of the world cannot speak Mandarin on demand. And time passed as quickly as possible for an 11 hour flight. We moved smoothly through customs and walked out to the curb only moments before Brad pulled up. It was perfect.

We made arrangements to meet the kids at my parents house and travel the last little leg home together. The Grandparents were happy with the opportunity to meet the boys. And our stop provided a more neutral and less overwhelming environment for initial intros.

The boys have done amazingly well today. Aiden continues to run from experience to experience with glee and optimistic anticipation. Nathan was more quiet today but very happy. He was eager to leave the hotel room and board the plane today. He seemed to have a lot of fun with his siblings today. But there is a lot to process.

I am hoping everyone can manage a full night's sleep to help settle all of the emotions of the day. A girl can hope...

Happy boys waiting for our plane.

Nathan watched with great anticipation as the plane was prepared for boarding. He was so eager.

Aiden was the only one to sleep on the plane. A solid 4 hours. It's nice to be small enough to curl up in someone's lap and snooze your boredom away.

Aiden and I building Lego vehicles.

Aiden kept opening the window (when all of the other passengers want it to be dark to sleep. I kept telling him no until it was dark. He was so excited to watch the sunrise.

Home. This is our family. Of ten. I just don't even have the words. Feeling blessed.

Last Blog Post from China

We made it! This is the last blog post from China! I can hardly believe it has been 3 weeks. My flight from San Francisco to Shanghai feels like a lifetime ago. But at the same time it is hard to wrap my mind around the fact that it is already time to go home. I can't believe how well this has gone. All credit goes to God. These boys have done amazingly well. I have had strength and patience beyond the norm. The kiddos at home have done extremely well and daddy has had everything he needed to do more than survive. Everyone has loved their time with dad and away from work. 

We are blessed. 

For our last day I reserved a very special activity for the boys. I'm actually a little surprised I was able to hide them this long. But I brought both boys their own RC car. Nathan tried really hard to pretend he wasn't interested in his. Until we went to the park and I had only brought Aiden's. The boys had driven the cars all over the hotel and through the indoor mall area attached to our hotel. But when I offered to put Nathan's in my backpack before we left the hotel he said no. Until he realized Aiden was allowed to drive his car in the park. He immediately started repeating, "Me? Where me? Me too! My car?!" 

We had a great time in the park despite Nathan missing his car and even got trapped by some real rain for a whole 15 minutes. I told the boys in Chinese: "THIS is rain." And we stood beneath a covering to wait the rain out. We enjoyed some nice thunder and one lightning streak before the cloud passed. It was beautiful. 

Amongst our activities today were pipe cleaner creations. Aiden thought this was great fun. Nathan got his tablet back today and was much more interested in catching up on what he had missed on Cue Cue (Chinese Facebook). 

We also played with balloons, did the usual Uno 'til our eyes went cross and a few other paper games. 

We managed to run into 2 other families at our hotel while our room was being cleaned. I enjoyed some English adult conversation. I feel like I found them too late though. Cause we are outta here!

Not much else to say other than 'See you in America!!!' One more sleep...

From China 04/11

Today was rather long. Aside from changing hotels for the final time we didn't have much else to do. The only reason we are still in China is to wait for the boy's visas. Once they are delivered tomorrow afternoon we can leave. But that means there really isn't anything left to do. We've seen the sights. We've done all the appointments. Now we just wait. 

So, it has been the ultimate game of "entertain the small people." We have made fruit loop necklaces, played subway surfer and Uno until our eyes went cross, made lunch in the hotel room and strategically took a couple trips to 7-Eleven for water and ice cream to break up the day.

Our one major outing was to the park. I noticed it was supposed to rain from 3-4 so I planned our walk for then. These boys both believe they will melt in the rain like the wicked witch from the Wizard of Oz. It was time for a lesson. The 'rain' here has been the lightest sprinkle I have ever seen. I don't even notice it. We would call it a mist at home. The droplets are not even big enough to fall from the sky. They float and swirl about on their way down. 

But my boys constantly, and I mean constantly, complain of being wet and saying we must hurry inside. We walked in the 'rain' for over and hour and a half and our clothes were not even damp. Aiden kept wiping his head with his shirt and managed to accrue a small damp spot on the bottom of his shirt. He continually told me his shirt was wet and he needed a new one. Lesson in progress. 

Nathan kept telling me over and over again in Chinese: "Mom, it is raining." I got so tired of saying, "I know it is." that I finally started sh

reaking in terror after his statement and ran beneath a tree for cover with the best dramatics I could muster shrieking, "rain!" in Chinese. Both of the boys laughed heartily and finally seemed to receive the message. The informative statements of "it's raining" finally reduced to every five minutes rather than every 20 seconds. 

When we finally returned to the hotel room Aiden asked to change his shirt. When I said no he looked at me in disbelief. I told him it would dry. (It was not wet). He smiled and reenacted my "rain" scream with the dramatic motions I had used. I laughed and said, "yes." And we got back down to play time.  

These boys are in for a shock in our family. 

The next 24 hours are going to be a little rough. We have nothing left to do and I am getting pretty trunkie. My patience is wearing thin and the boys are getting bored. Not a good combo. 

No matter what happens in the next two days I am just trying to keep my eye on the prize and get us home. This has been a truly remarkable trip and I feel incredibly blessed. Now to just not trip at the finish line...

From China 04/10

Today's picture is in front of the American Embassy here in Guangzhou. Today was our consulate appointment. They do not allow phones or other cameras inside so this is my only picture. But I love this picture because the same thing happens every time I visit the embassy in a foreign country: when I see that flag my heart swells! 

I have enjoyed this trip to China so much. The last time we came I didn't really have any desire to come back. It was so hot. Being here again has been so much better than I expected. I actually wouldn't mind staying longer his time if my family were here. I need my husband and children (and I miss the rest of you too) but I am not tired of the food or the sights or the culture differences this time. But no matter how much I have been able to enjoy myself this time, I love my country. And I was so happy to see that flag today. So close to home. 

After our appointment we came back to the hotel to play. Nathan left his tablet in someone's bag again. Yes again. He knew he wouldn't get it back until tomorrow so he went to bed to console himself with a nap. Aiden and I made origami together for a couple hours. We all had lunch together in our room. Then we took a little outing to the store. 

I wanted a red pen for a project I am working on from home. I was so proud of myself for finding my red pen! The Aeon market is a five story Walmart/mall combination. It was a bit like finding a needle in a hay stack. After my victory we celebrated with ice cream at McDonalds. 

When we got back to the room we carved soap sculptures for a couple hours. Well, Aiden and I made sculptures. Nathan spent the entire time cutting his soap bar with scissors. Whatever passes the time... 

Aiden loved my little hulk guy. He took multiple pictures of it. We made the 'A' for Aiden together. And he made the cheese block himself. I asked Nathan if he wanted a picture of his soap stub. He didn't. But this was definitely an effective way to pass a few hours.

We also played basketball. I brought a nerf hoop and taught the boys 'PIG'. This was great fun for another hour. 

We got a little stir crazy by dinner time so we went out for dinner and a walk. The hotel grounds are pretty amazing here at the Garden Hotel. It was fun to see the waterfalls all lit up. 

Now we have about another hour to pass before bath time. One more day done!!

From China 04/09

Today I am including 3 pictures. Because today was just that good. It almost felt like home. We were able to hike in the mountains today. This was the first time I felt like I was not in China. I am not a city girl. And most of the time China just feels like one giant city. Getting away from all of the high rise buildings and surrounding ourselves with lush green mountain felt so good. 

We visited Bai Yun San (white cloud mountain). This mountain has over 100 different temples tucked away inside of the grounds. We saw both a Taoist and a Buddhist temple along our way. We also played in some small water falls and saw the city line from the top of the mountain. It was gorgeous. We spent almost 4 hours on the mountain and could have easily spent the other half of the day there. But the boys were hungry and tired so it was time. 

As usual, Aiden was enthusiastic and happy...

And Nathan was dramatic...

This "I'm going to die on the mountain" act only lasted the first 45 minutes or so. Also as usual, once the act wasn't working for him he started to enjoy himself and have fun.

There were a lot of stairs...

One of the Taoist temples. Small, but beautiful in it's own right.

The glass walkway was fun.

The temples hidden in the mountain side made me think of movies where people discover lost cities. It was super fun.

One of the Buddhist temples. Amazing that they climbed the mountain to build such a large and beautiful temple.

It was about 85 degrees today so when we made it back to the hotel I didn't let the boys sit until we had changed to swim clothes and made our way to the pool. We swam much longer than we have before. And both the boys finally found the courage to get in the big pool with me. (We did still spend a good amount of time in the baby pool.) We also, of course, enjoyed some time in the spa. 

After swimming we went back to the room to have a little down time. At least, I wanted down time. Aiden has gotten very snugly since our zoo day. Today he wanted to be in constant contact with me. It was so sweet. Until it wasn't anymore. Today was the first time I felt like I needed a break. I'm starting to feel a bit home sick. And being 100% "on" is wearing on me. There isn't even a 15 minute shower after the boys go to bed to enjoy alone. If I am not in bed with the lights off and devices off they just can't sleep. So from the moment my eyes open to find Aiden staring at me in the morning to the moment I tuck Nathan into bed (translation: usher him into his bed and take his tablet away) and turn off the light at night I have been "on." I ended up taking a mid-day shower today to find my reprieve. Thank goodness for electronic babysitters. 

After our time relaxing we went out for pizza. We have an early appointment at the consulate tomorrow so bedtime will be strictly enforced tonight. Tomorrow is one step closer!