We've all felt anxious from time to time. We all recognize "butterflies" before a big event. Many of you out there probably know what it feels like to have a near-miss situation that gets your fight or flight response triggered. You know, when the person in front of you swerves into your lane, or you stumble while stepping down off a ladder or chair, or sometimes even just watching one of your children get injured will bring that heart-pumping tingly feeling throughout your body. When it has happened to me some of my large muscles will ache and burn and I usually have to breath deeply for just a minute to make it go away. These are little shadows of what genuine anxiety and panic are like.
I can identify two times in my life that I have felt true anxiety and panic. Anxiety occurred a handful of times during my struggles with PPD. Usually when leaving home or entering certain areas of home. It was a very uncomfortable feeling that I could not identify or explain. I just felt really agitated. If I was away from home I really wanted to go back. And inside my house certain areas made me feel like I needed to run away. It was fight or flight. But there was no danger. I was on high alert, ready to move but no where to go.
And the only time I can say I have experienced true panic was just this year when I had bronchitis. I experienced something called a bronchial spasm which is the same symptoms of an asthma attack. I could not get enough air and I started to panic. My head was spinning, my arms were tingling, my heart was beating fast, I felt the need to move and pace at the same time I felt weak and disoriented. It was a terrible feeling.
These are very real physiological reactions that anxiety and panic attacks cause a person to feel whether or not there is any kind of real danger. Adults and children who face anxiety and panic regularly are warriors. I have one of these little warriors in my home.
During the fourth grade year students have the opportunity to participate in an over night field trip. Our school goes to Coloma Resort where they learn about the gold rush first hand. When Caitlin was in fourth grade I was able to accompany her class as a chaperon. It is a fantastic camp.
Amber started talking about this field trip last year long before any of the other students even seemed to be aware of it. We've been preparing her ever since. It has been a year of preparation that paid off in a major way. Her over night experience was not without incident, but my little warrior fought through and had an amazing time at camp. There is nothing she can't do.
Bottom right, next to her favorite teacher ever.
Things we did to prepare our warrior to fight her 'worry bug':
-identify the worry bug: we gave him a name. We talked about what he does to her body and how to identify when he was trying to be in charge (tingly arms and legs, fast breathing, achy muscles, feeling her own heart beat, feeling scared or confused, etc)
-practice breathing techniques during calm and control
-limit sensory overload with Dramamine, ear plugs, a stress ball, non-restrictive clothing, and a plan of action of where to go to decompress if needed
-identify what areas she needed control: Amber has anxiety specific to traveling in the car and car sickness. So this was an area she needed to feel control. Mom drove her to and from the camp in our big van with 5 other students. The kids in our car were asked ahead of time if they needed Dramamine and supplies were on hand. We reviewed everything before we left. She knew we were ready no matter what.
-comfort items: we talked for months about what to say to the other kids about her 'special' items if they asked. Amber doesn't want to stick out and 4th grade is a tough time to be different. We built her confidence in using her own tools to battle the worry bug. She took her best stuffie 'dewdrop' for the bunk house. She chose photos of mom and some others to have on hand. She kept a bag with her ear plugs and stress ball. She knew what she wanted, she just needed permission and confidence to use them.
-make any scenario okay: we talked about 'what would happen if'. Amber knew she could call me. She knew I would drive all the way up there if she needed me. And she could even come home if it came to it. Each time we talked about these scenarios I would say something like, "I know you wont need it, but just in case, it is okay to..." Confidence first, reassurance second.
This victory was about much more than just one over night field trip. This was Amber's first opportunity to prove that she can stand alone. Even without a family member for miles around. She is strong enough. She is in charge of that wild little body and she can do anything she sets her mind to.
So proud of my little warrior.
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